Awake

         School has started back up.I am still not moved up near the college so that means twice a week I still drive over 100 miles. Soon though I know I will be moved.Even though that day in time remains unknown to me. And lately houses are hard to find. I feel one step closer now that I no longer have my part time job. Free from this small little town. Free to move to something different maybe just for a little while, maybe to learn maybe to grow. I think it will be really nice to be able to move closer to my school. Sometimes I get so excited I giggle.
  "Wow, I really am in College."
There is something about my life right now that allows me to smile. Maybe I have learned to smile over the years, or maybe I know that my life is always changing so why not just enjoy it right now.
    Life an be painful, and there will be time where nothing make since. But when we stop sleep walking we allow ourselves to wake up and see that life is our to live. I heard a great quote that I want to share. I think about it when things seem to much to handle. Maybe you find beauty in this life and may you smile often. 

      

“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers." 

~Kahlil Gibran

For Better or For worse

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 

Jeremiah 29:11-13

      On Saturday I was able to be part of a beautiful wedding. The wedding was wonderful. I guess that is what you get when you watch two people being joined together in marriage. Two people that love God and are willing to commit their marriage to God. It is beautiful.
    Well after the wedding I started thinking about how God has called me his Bride. Well in all honestly I think the wedding got me thinking about how some day I would love to find the man God has for me. A  man that will love me everyday no matter what I can give to him. I guess I was thinking about love. But on my ride home I got the feeling that I was very much loved in a special way already more then I could every be loved by any man. God has called me his bride.
   It is a humbling feeling to know that God loves you no matter what you do or say. My human response went something like this. Many tears, repentance on my part,and then my bright idea which was live a better life.
    So that night I decided that I was going to live a better life. Funny right? I guess I just wanted to feel like I should deserve the love God has for me. So that night I really focuses on reading my bible  and praying. Then the next day I woke up and headed to work. Things where going great until I got stuck behind a slow driver. Then I BLEW it. I totally lost my kindness and did not handle it in the way that I should have.  Worthlessness, Shame, the power of sin. Those are the feeling that could have flooded my mind. Right? I mean here I was not ever 24 hours in to trying to give God what he deserves and I was failing. Why should I be able to feel worth something? How could God love someone that could not give him anything in return?
God loves me so much! Yes he is not happy with sin. But those feeling I feel when I fail God  have no right being part of my life. They were put to death when Christ died for my sins on the cross.  God is God and I am his Bride, on my worse day God loves me the same as he did on my best day.  Maybe I am still learning his. I know I am. It may be hard to understand how God could love me or you for better or for worse. That he knows what is best for you. Fatem that I tell myself. Think about that when you feel alone or scared. I am Gods bride clothed in white because of what Christ did I get to wear white instead of what the color of sin is.



                                      "Nothing can separate us from the Love of Christ."

Newness

   Well school has started and has been going good. I love it I really do, but I feel overwhelmed about 5 days out of my week.  But who cares right? No pain no gain. :) I did go down to Office Depot and buy myself a big calender. Look out Dean's list here I come!!
    I have some new exciting and scary news too. For one week starting today I will be living on a farm not to far from my College. If all goes well I will be hired as a farm hand.   
The day I found that job I really was questioning what my next step was. With x amount of dollars and with winter coming I knew that staying in my little camper was not the thing to do. As of about 6 days ago that was my home. Don't get me wrong I loved it dearly. But the cold nights really were getting to me. So my point is this. Call it faith call it luck. But what is it really? What is it that makes our path clear right when we need to take a step? Why is it that sometimes we take steps even when we have no idea where we are going? Is it God, is it us? These are my real questions. Sometimes I can feel so lost and out of control then just when I need it there is something to look forward too. It happened just the other day so what do you do naturally when you see something ahead? You move ahead. That is what I did or am doing right now. It feels kinda like nothing I felt before, yet I know I have felt this feeling a 100 times already. It is that feeling of newness,and the feeling that I only know how to explain one way.With a short story. When I was a child we traveled to the ocean 2 or more times a year. It was and still is my all time favorite place. About 10 miles from the beach is a small town. From this town there is no way you can see or smell the beach, yet each and every time we drove through this town I thought for sure I did smell the salty ocean. It was just because I knew that I was so close and in my mind It made the Ocean seem right there so real to me that I thought I could smell it. Same with each step I take, I know that I can't see my dreams coming true right now yet a part of me honestly feels them coming true. It is a wonderful feeling caused only by moving ahead.         
      There is also a feeling of sadness as you move ahead. I cried as I drove out of the town I grew up in yesterday. It is a place of pain and joy stories after stories. It is a place that I was raised in it was all I have known. To drive out of the place that pretty much was your life was sad. As you drove you knew that behind you was family and friends. Trees that you hung from as a child. Rivers you swam at. The church you were baptized in and attended each Sunday. The School that was so little yet held a huge place in my heart. All of this was slowly getting smaller and further away as my old car drove on. Such a sad feeling really. A part of me wishes that I was there back at the place that I knew who I was at the place that knew me. And then there is the part of me that dreams of something different then a small town, something different then a small town girl too.     
                      So here I go taking another step.

Maybe I will keep this blog more updated and you can see where my journey will lead me.
                           Always beautiful,

Two amazing things.... that taught me a leason

I have done a very horrible job about updated my blog. I will not even begin to list all my excuses. But I will list one. Just one.  Can anyone say summer time? The word should be defined as crazy, busy, fun, and limited to any free time. 

I really have been having the best summer I think I have ever had. 

I have been doing so many things ,but I will not write about them today , because I do not feel inspired to write about them yet. Instead there is something else that I desire to write about. Two things, but I think they beautifully come together, so in the end I will have written about them both. LOVE when that happens.

 Love! It seems to be a heavy topic this time of year. Lots of people in it, many people despise it, some people fear it. Love is funny because it can be a noun or a verb. It can be something you want, something you have, something you do. It can make you incandescently happy or miserably sad. It can be the source of good in your life and the source of evil. It opens doors, yet also breaks hearts. I love love. Everything it entails. I love things, I love people, I love the idea of caring so much about anything that you need a word specifically to describe how you feel about it. I love that it gives people hope. I love that even in the darkest and saddest of times, you at least feel something. People do crazy things when they're in love . There are so many forms of love, and it means many different things to different people, but I want to talk about love in relationships (typical, right?). 

Two amazing things have happened to me both around July 4th. I have to smile about them both there is just no way not to. They both are so different that at first I thought they were in no way connected. But then today I found out that they are. Sorry I know you must be dieing to find out what they are. So I will stop rambling and tell you. The first is a beautiful nest. The other is a beautiful friendship. 

Humm you see why I thought they were once so different. But let me tell you the story of the nest first.

I am taking care of my Grandmother's garden while she is away. On the first day of water and tending to the plants I watched as a bird flew out of the a planter and landed on a near by bush.

 "I wonder what that silly bird is doing in the planter in the first place."

I thought well maybe she has a nest! Indeed she had a nest. With 4 beautiful little brown spotted eggs inside. I get excited very easily so as you can picture this with me please by all means smile. I jumped up and down waving my hands in the air and I'm sure I was screaming all the way inside. Where my Grandpa was. For some reason I thought that he was not aware of my joy. (He had been watching out his window the whole time) But he was very much aware of the joy the little eggs in the nest brought me. Although he smiled it seemed to me that he was not as thrilled as I was. He even had a very Grandfather moment and reminded me that the birds may not hatch and that I have to be ok with that if it happens. I don't think I really was listening to him or maybe I was but I was not willing to believe what he was saying. In my mind my little egg friends would hatch and I would soon have little bird friends.

And as I had hoped the did hatch! Two days later I went out to see the nest and a little cute (ok ugly) baby bird sat inside it. Just one. I was kinda sad when I thought that this little baby may be the only one that was gonna fill the nest. But the very next day the other 3 cute-ugly baby birds hatched. Every day I have gone out to look at them and admire them. I know that you are not to touch them, and so I don't. But I do stand close and smile at them. The first few days they just sat there not really doing anything at all. But yesterday when I looked at them they were all so big. They all 4 opened their mouth like I was their mommy bringing them food. And they sure are getting cute as the days pass. I know that one day I will go out there and I will find my nest empty and I think that part of me will be sad. But part of me will smile at the fact that the birds are some where out in this world living, flying around with the little wings I have watched grow. Someday they will build a little nest of their own and they will start all over. I know that the love I have for the birds are not the same kind of love I have for a friend or family member , but I think it is still a love feeling. A feeling of hope. These birds have shown me that as each day passes things change, you can do anything about the fact that somethings will be out of your control. But like I have done with my birds you can do with many things in life. You can smile at the things that make you smile and jump up and down at the things at make you that happy. Hope, happiness, love,and little Joy are the names of my little feather friends.

        So now is the other thing that I feel inspired to write about. Around the same time the birds were discover so was a friendship. I meant this guy, and like finding the nest and the eggs that is what I felt like. I felt like there could be hope for a friendship. I was more willing to think there was then to think there was not going to be a friendship at all. But I still had no idea if anything would happen. So I waited. And waited... and lastly waited some more. And then things started to happen. Slowly kinda like finding my hatched egg but only finding a little bird laying there not really doing anything. Which is fine. It is by all means good for me to wait. But the more me and this guy talked and e-mailed each other the more I wanted to wake up the next day just so I could see what was gonna happen . I found that he made me smile more then I thought anyone could make me. I laughed and giggled like a girl watching a romantic movie. :) I want nothing more then to make this new friend of mine smile as much as I do. I want to make his life as happy as it can be. I want to hear all the stories he will tell me. I want to just hear all he has to say, and ask him 100's of questions. I desire to know all.

But like the birds I can't do anything about anything, and honestly I don't want to. I want to just stand close and smile at the things I can smile at, and I want to be honest and open and I want to watch as things change and hopefully bloom into something beautiful and special. 

A crazy cat story

     Movies like where the Red Ferns grow, Old Yeller, Black beauty, and Lassie and very dangerous. You see they get you distracted ,and then you lose all your common sense. It doesn't matter if the movie is about dogs, horses, or even a pig. The all start off the same. There is a little child.. Now this little child has a deep deep longing for a animal. Their longing is so deep that they are put into a pit of depression because of it. Then after watching their child suffer the parents give in and get the child a pet of their very own. Or as some say a "friend" this child went from being in a pit of depression to being in a pit of total heaven. Finally a pet of their own to have and hold for the rest of its dear life. Yeah!!! But that is just it you think it will end happily but it doesn't. It is always a bitter sweet ending. The pet always die and it is then the the child realizes that the death of the animal is not important, because all the year and happy memories that were spent with them is so much more greater then death.  Blaaa blaaa blaaa.. But yet every time I watch them I am in tears. Finding myself saying "Ohhhh... I wish I could love like that." But what these stories refuse to tell you is this little fact. In this world there are millions of dogs and cats. Millions! Out of all of them there are 25 that are as good as the ones in the movies. 25, yes that is it. You see you watch these movies then you go to the pet store and buy a dog and never once think about it being a bad dog, but before you take it in your arms it is already an "Old Dan" to you. Don't feel bad if you have fallen for this lie , because we have too. Which is why I am here now writing a story about a cat and a little girl.
It all started with this one time. This one time... Oh I remember it like it was yesterday. My father was gone visiting and when he got back he had with him a kitten. A kitten for my little sister. The joy filled my little sisters eyes as my father told her this little cat was her very own. You see this cat was already perfect. It was cute and it was hers so nothing else mattered. Never once did we think that perhaps this cat was not one of the 25 good cats. We were in love that was all that mattered. How we feel in love with her so fast blows me away even to this day. You see although we knew the box that was in my fathers hands had a cat inside of it we knew not what she looked liked.  Yet we knew she just had to be sooo cute.
From inside the box you could hear her banging around.She was fighting mad. She hissed and whacked the box each time one of us tried to bend down to let her out.
"Don't worry children she will calm down she is just scared." These were my fathers words. Then he very quickly opened the box and we sat and watched as this gray thing ran as fast as it could under the couch. That was all we seen of her for the first lets see 2 weeks. She was a kitten when we got her , but before we really seen her up close she was almost full grown. During this time  my 4 year old sister started to train her. How she did it I don't know. But soon this cat would come up to her and follow her around. Heart touching I know. Kidding kidding. Although my little sister could touch this cat we could not. This cat soon became a nightmare to all of us. It peed on everything. It would knock over the plants. It would wait for someone to go to the bathroom and then attack them. It was so bad that when we had people over and we seen them heading for the bathroom all of us would yell.
 "Watch out!!"
  Late at night you could hear the little kids cry because the cat decided that its toys were boring and that the kids face seemed much funner. The cat was named Katie, Katie the kitty. Katie the Kitty loved her cat tree that sat in the far corner of our living room. The corner that the kids are sent to when they disobey. The corner that is right next to the boys room. It has become so bad that when they are sent to the corner the scream not because they are in trouble but because they know if they make one little move that the cat dislikes she will jump on them with all her claws out. They try hard to avoid getting sent there.
We as a family are not evil. We are the kind that take in strays and give broken winged birds a real chance at life. But we have all decided that this cat better not have 9 lives. Mom has offered to shoot her. I have offered to give her swimming lessons down at the river. The little boys all want her to be an out door cat that gets lost. Even at one point my little sister told me that she wanted a "real cat." She pleading to me that if she could sell Katie she would buy a horse.  This may all sound bad to you that we could all hate her so much. But she is a rotten cat that has been rotten since day one.
  Chances have been given to her. Sometimes she will lay on the floor and look so peaceful. My little sister will come and nicely lay down next to her. Katie will even crawl into her lap then just when we think she has out grown her meanness. She will bite my little sisters face.
    While my parents were gone one time they kindly ask that I would try my best to make Katie an outside cat. As I watched them drive down our driveway and I thought to myself. "Wow they could have asked me something easier like learning how to fly or something." So all week I spent trying to get this cat outside. This is hard he the cat for one not always likes to even be touched plus when ever she sees you carrying her to a door she freaks out ripping your arm skin clean off. Need I say this was not going to be the way I got her out. So my clever mind decided that if we could just put her inside something and then take her outside and let her go it was bound to work. So this is the point when a person finds a box or a cat carrier. Not me I found a cooler. Don't judge me! I mean think about it, it has four sides and a bottom and a top. Works for me. So I found her some canned food and put it inside then all of us hid behind the counter and waited... and waited. Finally she got inside and my little brother ran over and closed the lid and we all danced around for 5 minutes singing and shouting.
   Katie did not like the idea of spending a night outside. All night she scratched at the door and meowed in anger. She somehow lived that night.But the next day we went on living our happy life and she went on doing whatever she wanted too do. Truthfully she never crossed my mind until I heard the rushing of 3 kids come running into the house screaming there is something dead outside. Now if you are around kids much you know that they have many types of screams. They have the sad and scared scream ,and they have a scream of gladness. Sadly to say the scream I heard at that moment was a scream of gladness. I on the other hand was having mix emotions about all this. For one I disliked the cat, but I also disliked dealing with anything dead. But since I knew the dead thing had to be dealt with I went out to take care of it. As I walked across my yard I couldn't help but hear the little's talking.
"Do you think it was really her!." One had said.
"We will see." The other one said skipping like we were going to get ice cream NOT going to bury a dead thing.
 When I got over there I took one look at the thing and knew it was not her. But I laughed pretty hard at my siblings as they walked home heads hanging low.
THEY SHOULD MAKE A MOVIE OUT OF THIS...
The cat lived and the children have not been attacked since she has been outside. She even seems to be nice now that she lives outside.

Adoption

I have a simple question. How many of you are adopted? Do you know that if I asked that question in a classroom of 100 people, the likely hood is that 50 of those people will raise their hands. That is half the class! Half the class will raise their hand and state that they were adopted. I am adopted. I am adopted child. So, this subject is very important to me. It is important to me that all of you should understand what it means when a child is adopted. It is a subject that is very dear to me.
So, what is adoption?
Adoption is the legal and emotional acceptance into your family of a child not born to you. This child will have your name and the same legal rights as a child by birth. After the adoption is approved by the court, you will receive an official decree and a birth certificate with your name listed as the birth parent. It is now your responsibility to feed, clothe, house, and educate your adopted child. The adopted child should receive the same love and understanding as a child born to you.
Adoption has been going on for longer than, I think, most people realize. The first time America records it taking place as a legal act, was in 1851. Massachusetts passed the first modern adoption law, recognizing adoption as a social and legal operation based on child welfare rather than adult interests. Historians consider the 1851, Adoption of Children Act, an important turning point because it directed judges to ensure that adoption decrees were “fit and proper.” How this determination was to be made was left entirely to judicial discretion.
In the days of the bible, it talks about a brother stepping in and caring for his dead brother's family. This family now became his. Adoption is a big deal. Now, there are some who look down on it and say that it is not real. There are some who even say it is not a good thing, that it is too risky a thing to do. However, there are somethings that I would like to share with you. When a child is adopted by a family that does not share common blood running through their body the same as yours yet still choses to call you their child, when a mom and dad look at a child and fall in love with them and decide that this child will be theirs forever and ever, even though they may never be able to say where the scar on her left cheek came from or they may never understand why he is deathly afraid of water...these parents don't care where you came from, what you have seen or what you have heard. They want to love you and have you become their child. They want you to have a new life, a life where they will tell you things and show you things that you may never have been able to see or hear before. Sacrifice!
So, I know you are all thinking...why on earth is she giving us a history lesson about adoption during bible study?
This is my reason. I have one reason for doing so. Now, God may have more than one, but, I am telling you all this about adoptions so that you know and understand more deeply the love that God has shown you. Adoption is important to God.
" Now, when my time came and I placed my faith in Jesus, God instantly granted me a great salvation. He forgave me of all of my sins, past, present, and future. He made me His child, adopting me into His family. He gave me the gift of the Holy Spirit, who gives me God's power, who pours out God's love within my heart, and who tenderly communicates to my spirit that I am a child of God and an heir of eternal glory in heaven. In saving me , God also freed me from slavery to any and all my sins. I no longer have to sin again, for sin's mastery over me has been broken!"
Here are some verses I want to share with you. Colossians 2:13 , Psalm 103:12, Ephesians 1:5 , John 1:12 , Acts 1:8 , Ephesions 3:16 ,Ephesions 1:13-14, Romans 8:16-17 ,Romans 6:6-7-14
Any one that has placed their faith in Jesus has been adopted. Now, just because we are adopted doesn't mean that we live like we are. I know many people that have been adopted by loving families and yet they refuse to believe that they are loved and that they can live a different life. They think that at any moment their adoptive parents' love will end. They choose to live as orphans. There are people who have given their life to Christ. To Him they are His child, righteous before Him yet they choose not to live like that. They think that at any moment they will sin and that will be the deal breaker. They wait for that one unforgiveable sin that will seprate them from the love of their Father God. They remain the aloof orphan...distant and not trusting, waiting to be returned to the orphanage. I am going to tell you that it can't happen. You can't be unadopted. Once Christ adopts you you are given His name YOU ARE HIS CHILD FROM THEN UNTIL....FOREVER!!
Romans 8: 35
I understand more than most, that it is hard to change your thinking. It is hard to believe that nothing can change the way Christ looks at you. It is hard to go from the thinking that at any moment your are going to be cut off from His love to trusting and believing that what He says it real and true. But when you do, you will then start to look at the Gospel with truth and understanding. You will truly begin to see God's love for you.
I have something to ask of you. On a peice of paper I want you to write three things. I want you to write to God telling Him the ways you have been acting like an orphan and not His child. Then, I want you to hold onto that list and pray over it from time to time. I want you to notice that, when you are doubting and waiting for that final deal breaker, that you can pull out that list and say LIES!! I am a child of God and NOTHING, nothing can separate me from Him or from His love!

Prayer

Do you know that Prayer is not simply something we are allow to do as a Christian; prayer is actually one of the great purposes for which God chose to save me. As Christ said, "I chose you... that whatever you ask of the Father in my name He may give to you." I am a chosen one of God , I was saved to pray, and whenever I come into God's presence to behold Him, worship Him, or ask Him anything, I am arriving at the pinnacle of God's saving purposes for me.God is radically committed to my life of prayer. He sent His son to die so that I can stand in front of Him in love. Through the cross I have found a way into His Holy Place. "Draw near," He say in Hebrew 10. "Pray without ceasing," He not only says this once but many times. How can it be that even though I know that Christ's flesh was torn for me so that I would be able to pray. And that even though He tells me to Pray always. I still find myself not allowed to pray.
The Bible serves as the sweetest invitation for us to pray when I preach it to myself each day I will learn more and more. Soon it will nurture within me a mighty impulse to come before God in Love, and do the praying I was elected to do.

Dear great God,
Would you please fill my mind with Wisdom. Would you allow my eyes to not look at lustful things but rather look at Pure and Righteous things..Would there be Peace and Kindness on my lips. Would your Love and Mercy be in my heart. Would my heart not want anything as much as I want you. Would my hands Work hard for you. Serving as you served. Would I walk in your Path. Would you make me know you more. Would you show me your heart regarding me.
I love you Lord Amen

Josh Turner "I am second"

I came across a blog that had a posting of Josh Turner on it. I was so encouraged after reading it I thought it was a grand idea to write one myself. I have always liked his music , but now I can enjoy it even more. Praising God for yet another man who is out there that is not afraid to love God. For a man who stands up for what he believes. (More of this interview can be read on www.JoshTurnerIamsecond.com )

I had a vision of this long, black shiny train…..

Singing country music, that’s what I’ve always dreamed of doing as a young boy. Growing up in South Carolina, it was out the ordinary to dream such a dream.

I haven’t always been the guy that walks into a room and automatically the attention is on me. I’m normally the guy that stands off in the corner. Singing allowed me to express myself in ways that I wouldn’t be able to do otherwise. I don’t feel like God called me to be a gospel singer. He didn’t call me to be a Christian singer, he called me to be a country singer, and I just happen to be a Christian.

The one thing that I had to overcome was negativity. The idea that dreams can’t really come true, I never wanted to believe in that.

I grew up in a little place called Hannah, South Carolina, a little farming community a long way from any kind of big city. The first real album I owned was Randy Travis’ Storms of Life, and that was the album that really made me start dreaming of the possibility of doing this for a living. I moved to Nashville in 1998 to get a record deal and try to get my foot in the door, and I didn’t really know what I was doing.

God inspired me to write “Long Black Train.” I wrote this song, by myself, in my apartment, and it came to me in a vision. It’s a vision of this long, black, beautiful, shiny train, and people are standing out to the sides of the track, watching this train go by, just craving to get on it. At the same time, they know that this train leads to destruction, it leads to emptiness, it leads to nowhere, but yet they still want to get on it. This train was a physical metaphor for temptation.

I wrote three verses and a chorus that night in my apartment, woke up the next morning, I wrote the fourth verse. And at that moment in time when I laid the pen down, I said nobody’s ever gonna want to hear this. It’s too old-fashioned, it’s too old-timey, it’s a gospel song. So this is probably not going to end up on one of my records in the future.

And a friend of mine walked in and she said, can I hear it? And I was like well, sure. I played it for her, and she said you need to play this for such and such, and so it just snowballed from there. I ended up playing it for recitals, and all kinds of stuff, did demos of it. A girl in my class heard it on that demo, played it for MCA, they heard it. This was the song I played first time on the Grand Ole Opry, and got two standing ovations and an encore– I was completely unknown to the audience that night. It became the title track of my first record, it became my first hit, it helped me sell a million copies of the first record. So there were a lot of people hearing this song, a lot of people being touched by this song.

That was the moment that I realized it’s not about the money, or the fame, or the glory. It’s about changing people, it’s about touching people and influencing people in a positive way, and so from that point on, that’s what I’ve tried to do.

(There’s a long, black train coming down the line, feeding off the souls that are lost and crying. Rails of sin, only evil remains, watch out brother for that long, black train. )

There’s no song that I can write, there’s no record that I can make that’s going to save me. I do need a savior.

(Look to the heavens, you can look to the skies, you can find redemption staring back into your eyes. There is protection, and there’s peace the same, burning your ticket for that long, black train.)

I’m thankful to have Jesus as my savior. My relationship with God has always been one to where I’m talking to him all day, every day, about anything and everything. It’s just a continuous ongoing conversation that I have with the Lord, and I feel like that’s brought me closer to Him. It helps me think through things clearly, I feel like it’s given me wisdom about other people, about myself, about the life that I live. Ultimately, I get my joy from Him, and always put Him first.

My name is Josh Turner, and I am second.

Listen for the stones to drop

So you know those times when you read the Bible and say nothing afterward?
Then you read the same thing 3 months later,and say "Wow that is a good message." But you never put it to use in your life. It forever remains only a good message.
Then you hear someone talking about the same verse and what they way makes you say, "This is so true.. Wow I never though of that.. I will remember that one!!" (But come on I give you one full week, two at tops and it is GONE.)
Then one night we read the same verses, and we start crying ,and thinking of all these things that we never thought of before. I call that the 2 by 4. Sometimes it is more painful then other times. But both are caused by us missing or choosing not to see what God was showing us the first time. All the pain we cause ourselves. (Silly sinners)
Well I will tell you my story of the 2 by 4 that just hit me aside my head. I did all the things that I listed above in that order even. The verses were John 8:1-11
It has always been one of my favorite stories in the Bible. But I never really took the time to study and pray about it. When God was opening the door for me to learn about it I was slamming it back in his face. But tonight God showed me it and for once I listened to him.

One of my friends and I were talking about her abuse(Sexual abuse) and how she was afraid that people would judge her if they knew. Although I wanted to tell her the nice comforting lie of

"No one will judge you." I couldn't do it.
Like I said it would be a lie. As we talked I listened to her share with me some lies she believed about the abuse. I watched her try her hardest to avoid there being anything to talk about.
There was the desire to cover it up like it was nothing.
There was the shame that she felt.
There was the desire in her heart to hide it from me and anyone else.
There was the desire to just tell someone and get it over with.
As I tried to comfort her and tell her the truth to those lies. I felt that her and me shared something. But it was more then that.
Oh could it be!!!?? that the verses that I had been pushing away had yet another lady that shared something else with us?

The Woman that was caught in adultery.
The picture of that story was the picture of ME. It was the picture of my friend too.
This woman was caught in the act of adultery. That is a little more then just her flirting. To me it means that is is not wearing anything ,or she is barely wearing anything.
Jesus is teaching in the temple. When all of a sudden the scribes and the Pharisees burst in.
(I'm trying to paint a picture for you.) So with them I imagine is a group of people.. They tell him everything that this women did. Then they remind Jesus that Mosses wrote that she should be stoned. "What do you say?'' they asked him. Nothing more was said. Jesus stooped down and started writing on the ground. Meanwhile what is everyone else doing? What is the woman doing? I never thought about this before. But this really happened , and they were still there so what were they doing? I think the people that were gathered around the women were looking at her with judgement and disgust. I think they shook their heads in anger. I think with one hand they held the woman making sure she knew that she was about to be punished. And with their other hand I think it was tightly gripping the stone in which they intended to punish her with. The stone in which they would kill her with.
The woman, what do I think she was doing? I think she was scared. I think that was felt her sin. I think that felt her sin, and knew what it looked like. I think while all the people stood around her and casted their stares at her she could see very clearly what she looked liked ,and what she was.

Then Jesus spoke, "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast the stone at her."
Then once more He stooped down and wrote on the ground.
Silence filled the temple. Then the sound of the rocks hitting the ground. Then the woman felt the painful tight grips of the men that held her no more. Nothing but the foot steps of the people leaving could be herd. The woman watched as those who accused her left.
Did she feel freedom?
No, I think she was still scared. She had heard about Jesus. Wasn't he the son of God? Wasn't he the great teacher? Surly he would look up at her and see her and judge her? Kill her? Didn't she deserve it? Didn't she sin?
Jesus stood up and looked at her." Woman," the same name he called his own mother. Woman... Not whore, not unclean.
"Woman, where are those thine accusers? Hath no man condemned thee?"
She whispered out "No man, Lord"
"Neither do I condemn thee: Go ,and sin no more."

Even though I was not caught in the act of sin neither my friend. We all three have been right where the woman was. I was her.. I was there only I begged please stone me...
But just as Jesus did with the Woman he did with me. He waited until everyone that accused me were gone. He and me were the only ones standing. Well I was on my face before him.
Then he said where is everyone? I looked around and I was free no one was there to judge me. I was clean. How did I get this clean! Then he said it is me that make you clean. Your judgement is gone because I stepped in front of you. The Father looks at me and sees me instead of you. I paid your price. Go and sin no more.

I think that it is beautiful how he waited until everyone else left. It was just him and her there. Because no matter what it is people judge us. But their judgement doesn't matter, Jesus's does. Jesus paid our price on the cross. So where ever you are today listen to the stones dropping around you ,watch as everyone walks away. And look up at Jesus and thank him. Don't be the one that is judging yourself either. Go and sin no more. Make the choice today to change. Jesus was enough for your sin once he forgives you , you are free to let the sin and the same go too.

Don't believe them!!!

I want to share with anyone who is going to read this a very important message. Mostly this is for girls and women, but hey it could fit just as well in a mans life too. What I'm going to say is a very simple fact -challenge, yet hardly anyone will be able to do it. Want to know what it is????
It is this.
Stop believing the lies that the world are telling you. I know it is hard in to today's world to figure out that almost everyone and thing around you wants to see you as less. It's hard when all your friends and the T.V tells you that you are not allowed to enjoy yourself.
I'm not talking about a be free, have fun, get drunk ,do drugs thing. I'm just a young lady who is tired of people going on diets and looking into the mirror and saying mean things about themselves. I'm tired of watching young people think they are less then they really are because they are not married. It's....... it's just silly. And trust me I know what I'm writing about because I do it too. We have all these people and things that expect us to be something that we are really not suppose to be. When God made us he did not want us to listen to "Glamor Girl." He had his own idea of what beauty and happiness looks like. But I don't even know if we know what his idea looks like anymore thanks to lies!!
Teens don't have sit at home and fry their brains with movies and Video games. They don't have to have the world think that the only thing they are good at is getting into trouble. I mean when the only thing your mommy and daddy expects you to do at 17 is make your bed that is sad. Horrible.
But yet we are not willing to show them that we can handle more then that.
So maybe your not lazy maybe you can handle making your bed ,and cleaning the house and make bread.
But are you the type of person who is never happy with yourself? When someone goes to take a picture do you turn away? Every morning do you look in the mirror and say how ugly you are? Does none of your clothes fit right? Do you think makeup makes you prettier? Do you think that acting a certain way will make you someone better?
I say yes to some of these. I live believing so many lies too. But why for what reason, tell me what does thinking you look fat bring you? Do you really want to be lazy everyday? Do you want to be the type of person that only will be happy when you are married? Or maybe only can really enjoy life when you have this job and this bill paid off? I'll answer for you.... NO NO NO!! No you want to learn to love what God has made you look like. You want to be helpful and busy. You want to be thankful ,and honestly happy right where you are now. I know I do.
Tonight I am doing laundry at 10 pm. I am blogging and I love it. I love that right now I can be honestly happy. Sure I want to be married and I have dreams other then these things, but that is not stopping me from being useful and happy right where I am.
Be who you really are. Maybe you need to change some things. But I'm sure when God created you he made somethings good in you... Just a thought.
So be challenged this week. Do what is good. Like what you look like. Laugh at who you are. Enjoy where you are.
For one week I challenge you to not think about being somewhere different or someone different. I challenge you to stop believing the lies!!

1st Birthday....baby boy

One year ago I received a call from my sister telling me that she was in labor. I knew that I should be expecting a call,but no words can describe just what was going on inside my mind. Fear and excitement. First of all she is my sister so it comes natural to me to worry for her health and the babies.Then there was the fact that I was one of her Midwives so it now became my job.....God blessed me that day. In so many ways he blessed so many others too.Being able to see the birth of my nephew was amazing, the whole birth was moving. He was a healthy little boy. So small and fragile. I prayed that the Lord would make him into a mighty man. A God fearing man someday. That no matter where he was that the Lord would protect him.
I have watched him grow over this last year. I watched as he started to crawl then walk. I heard him start to talk and laugh. I have come to love him with all my heart. And today I was able to celebrate his First Birthday with him. It was amazing. I love that little baby and he will always have a special place in my heart.
~ Happy Birthday Baby boy!!!

A well rounded me..

I know that it's past the 1st of the year, so to many it is to late to make changes ,or goals for the year 2012. But I stand from a view that at any point you can make changes. And at any point you can ask GOD to give you wisdom in what needs to be changed. I did just that this week. I asked God not only what he wants me to be doing today, but what areas I need to work on. I'm almost 19 years old, I'm done with school, I'm single, and I do not have a job that demands me to be gone for hours and hours. Sooo..... now would be the perfect time to enhance some skills, learn some more, practice things that I haven't been able to do in a while. Just because I could have lots and lots of free time doesn't mean that I should be able to spend it in a useless way. I want to make changes in my life. Changes that will affect me for the rest of my life. After I got done praying, asking God to tell me what I need to be doing. I thought about some things. People almost always make new year goals that never get reached ,and the ones that people do accomplish are goals that only will bring short time changes. I don't want to do that. If I'm going to change in an area in my life ,and if it is going to be hard work for me to do. I want it to be on something that will still matter when 2013 or 2014 comes.Something more then losing a few pounds or visiting the ocean. I want it to change me forever, making me a well rounded person.
So I made a list. Some of the stuff on there are skills that I want to learn while others are some things I know already know, but that I want to make more time for. For example,

• I want to learn wood work.
• I want to practice my piano more than once a week.
  
• I want to play with my little siblings. I want to make time for them.
  

The list is much longer. I just wanted to give an example.My goals for this year are things I think will make me into a better person. A more skilled lady. I want to be ready for whenever God tells me to do a job.I want to know more then the average teen knows. I want to make myself into a WELL ROUNDED ME!!
,In him I live and write

Family

In his arms

I feel sick right now. Not from a cold or a flu. But from sin. I'm sorry if this post makes people upset. Or makes them roll their eyes or feel uncomfortable. I'm sorry if you feel disappointed with me after you read this. The truth is I'm bound to hit one of those feelings with someone. I do have many friends that do not live are believe the way I do. I have family that are way different than me. But at some point I think everyone has felt the same way. I think everyone has felt pain.No matter how many walls you have built around your heart or how tough you claim to be everyone on this earth felt it at one point or even still feels it as I type.
Well I'm at that spot right now to write this. The place where my heart literally is in pain. I'm doubting myself right now. I'm wondering if I should write this in the morning because my eyes are burning and swollen from crying. I will write this tonight. If not for anyone else for ME. For me to fully understand SIN. I was on the other side of this post a few months ago. I was the very one I am writing about. I was the one that caused others to feel sick and have burning eyes. I was the one that had TRUE friends say "I love you." I was the one that spit on them and their words, and I was the one that said God leave me the hell alone stop messing up my life. Yes, I said Hell. Those were MY words to God.
So here I am. Here I am being spit on by someone I would lay my life down for. Someone that has been in my prayers almost every night for years. Someone that I have never really been BEST friends with, but I have watched her as she cried because her parents shipped her off to a school. I was there the day she bought a pregnancy test. I was there to see her young face show fear. To be honest I was even with her in the bathroom as she took it. I was there and watched her fight with people as she decided what to do now. I was there when she told me her boyfriend and her split up. I was there when she decided that when her baby was born she would let it be adopted to a better home. I was with her by her side for 9 months as her belly grew and her baby started to grow. I was in the same room with her as she heard the babies heartbeat. I was the one that wiped her tears off her face for her when the nurse said it was a girl.... I was with her as she went into labor. My hand was her stress relief. I was there as she handed her newborn beautiful baby girl into the hands of a wonderful couple that would take her miles and miles away...... And sadly I was the one that saw it break her heart. I was the one that seen her run as far as she could. I watched her cover her pain up with a marriage. I watched her husband treat her like dirt. I watched her fall and fall away from God. I watched her make God nothing but an old man in the sky for her and her life. Now I'm watching her divorcing. Now I'm watching her suffer more pain. Now I'm bagging for her to move back so that I can hold her hand once more and be the one to wipe her tears off her face. And God is telling me no. God is telling me that it won't help. That hurts, I love her I want to tell her even if it is a lie that everything will be ok. At first when I remembered all I was there with her for I wonder why God had shown me it. But now I know that God was there for all the parts that I was and the parts that I wasn't. He loves her more than I could ever love her. And he hates all that is going on. I can't help but say that this amount of pain I feel is tiny compared to what God feels...
God is showing me and reminding me of my very life and where it was that I was at not to long ago. I had people that loved me. I even had people that told me it was all going to be ok. It did nothing. I needed to be able to go to God and let him do that. I needed to wake up and repent and run to him. When I did do that really really and honestly trust only God with my life. All my tears were wiped away. All the pain I felt, the uncertainty I lived with daily were gone. It wasn't magic it was the power of God. When I came to him that day it was like nothing I had ever felt before . It was like all I felt was his huge hug. I didn't feel shame. I didn't feel scared. I felt the love of God around me. No way was there a worry in my life that day. I had made it back home to him. Right were his girl needs to be. So tightly wrapped up in his arms that nothing can harm me. Not even myself.
It was a long hard lesson that I had to learn before I figured that was what God wanted and what I needed. I had grown up without trust. I was hurt and not ever protect as a child. And so when I meant God sure I loved him and read the bible. But I was always waiting for that sin that would make him hate me. I was always worrying about things because surly if God was in control he would mess it all up. Never was his love enough for me. I was looking in every place possible for love and affection. So I went on a little ride to hell,as I like to say. It hurt me so much do be on my own, kicking God out of my life day after day. Thinking that I was better at life them him.
So as I watch my friend do the same and suffer the same I am sickened. I knew that God allowed me to go through all I have been through to teach me and better my relationship with him. But now I see that in fact it was so I could always be reminded that Sin is horrid. My friend is not the only one that suffers from it. So many people do. Oh that's right we all do. So every time I see the old Brandie come out in others I should be remind to pray. I should be the one that doesn't judge but tells them that God wants them to be in his arms. I should tell them that God is what they need. As I feel this pain for her. I am remind how much it hurts God too. He created her and her heart. He desires her love and look at it.
A year or so ago I wrote this letter for this same friend. I never did find the perfect time to give it to her until now. Funny how God allowed me to write it to her then. But is telling me to give it to her now. I would like to share it with you too.
To ......
I have a love of my life. No one but me truly understands how much I love her. How much I want her all to myself. But most of the time she forgets all about me. She lives her life like we've never even meant. If you were to see her you might not even know that we have shared a love deeper than most. Sometimes she'll go weeks or even months without talking to me. I try to bring up conversation, and I always let her know how special she is to me.....
But I can tell she is moving on. That I'm not enough for her. I can see she thinks that there is someone else out there for her that will love her more than I do. I tried telling her that her"new lover'' won't love her. That he won't look out for her in ways that I do. She doesn't understand that I really care about HER. I love her not because she can make me happy, or that she has something I would like. I love her unconditionally. She cries at night because no one is there for her. She talks to her friends about how she wants someone .. anyone to love her. All this time she does it in front of me like I can't hear her or see her. She does it like I don't what that from her. She wants a prince to rescue her but she chooses not to look at me. If she would just look at me once.... Truly look at me then she would see that my arms have been waiting wide open for her since she left. But she never sees that. She can't see the tears I have cried for her. She can't see my heart being torn apart, because instead of running to me she's running away. She's running into the arms of a sinner,a lair,and a man who will show her no respect. A man who will not love her like I do. I want her to be loved and protected. She refuses to think I know how to do that. She thinks she is the best judge of who that is.
Many people say to give up. She wants me to stop loving her. But as long as she runs I will still love her the same. Every day I have my arms waiting for her. So that when she wakes up and sees that she has forgotten her first love she will turn and see my open arms. I'm so really to hold her once more. I want nothing more but to wipe her tears away and all the filth she feels away with it. Oh how I miss my dear one...

Unchanging God

In this world there is hate, love, and there is fear. The list is long .There are people who laugh and have big families. While on the other side of the street there are small families who may be in tears. There are children who get abused. Wives that get beat up by their husbands. There is good and evil.
Before you say duhhhh.. Think about the worse thing that has ever happened to you. And as you read this keep that thought.
I want to tell you a story. A few years ago I was at a friends house eating breakfast. She asked me if I wanted some milk. I naturally said yes. She handed me the cup. Now.... I have had lots of milk before this cup. So without thinking about it, I took a drink, a big one, you might even say a slug. The taste of it was so noxious that it made me run to the bathroom. (I mean it was some BAD goat milk.) From that day on, when someone hands me a cup of goats milk, I smell that bad boy and I'm afraid to taste it. My point is not how you shouldn't drink goats milk. My point is that because I had bad goats milk once, I was forever changed. Same with other stuff in this life. I once crashed a motorbike. I'm now scared if I ride with on one today. When my brother was a baby, a dog barked right in his face, scaring him really bad. To this day he doesn't trust dogs.
It is very human of us to have something happen to us that changes our thinking of something or someone. Because I can, I'll say this. Too many times we allow something bad or good to change the way we look at God. When I was little I was abused, I thought until I was 14 that God hated me. I thought that He had given up on me. I looked around and all I saw were bad things. Now, what if I had grown up in a good loving home? Would I still have had to deal with thinking God was someone he wasn't? I tend to think yes. Because when I was 15 I was adopted into a loving Godly home. I still deal with things. I woke up the other day and I was crabby. I mean I was a bear. I was unhappy with everything. I thought that God was gone that day. I was sure that he was ANYWHERE but with me. That was a lie. A false accusation about God. I didn't understand any of this until the other day when I slid off the road into the ditch, in my car. Having to leave it there, as it hung out into the road teeter tottering on the edge of disaster. The car was practically daring me to kick it, so that it could fall further into the ditch. I walked away very upset. ''God please. Not tonight" I groaned. Some 2 hours later my car was pulled out without even a scratch with the help of some good friends. My friends dad told me how he was amazed that the car was unharmed. Then it hit me. God was there. The way God made my car land was so amazing. So if God kept my car and me safe, then that meant God was there as I was fishtailing down the road backwards? Did that mean he was there as I yell "Oh noooooo?'' YES, YES and YES. God was there even when I climbed out of my car and looked at it and thought about setting it on fire. God was there and he wanted me to see that He was there; when I crashed. But I'm a sinner and I'm not perfect. Nice excuse I know. But really God is the same. He is still Good, Faithful, Loving, and Forgiving. Even when we are are scared, mad, or lonely. Things that happen on this earth don't change Him. They don't make him leave, when we see bad things and they DON'T turn his truth into a lie. So what do we do? We pray and we pray a lot. Every day all day. We read his word so that we know what His truths are. When we come across one of His truths; like when He says ''I will never leave you or forsake you." But when stop and think of the past, we often jump up and yell, ''BUT, that one time GOD you couldn't have been with me." Its then we need to pray: God show me how you were really there. I often ask the Lord to show me why I can't see him sometimes, in the things that are going on around me. I ask Him to reveal what is really there, rather than what it is I am choosing to see. Like the car crash the other day, before my friend told me that God saved me, all I saw was a big mess, a big hole in my plan. But in the end I saw God's hand in my life. What is it that we will see when the truth is firm in our hearts instead of the stupid lie? How will we see the world when the truth is shown instead of our mixed up feelings at our messed up situation.
What if we chose to believe Him...? What if we trusted what He told us about Himself rather than our own feelings? It is then, when we are at the rock bottom of the pit, that we will see the truth and we will see that the truth does NOT move. That even at those moments when our hearts have broken and pain runs like a river, we can see the joy that is present. The joy of God that is continuously with us, ever comforting, ever encouraging, ever moving, ever loving and everlasting God..forever and ever amen.

In Him I live and write,

It's a family thing

"I wouldn't be worried but........ yes you will probably die." Quote from my father. Oh, all the things that families say. Sometimes they are the worst. Have you ever noticed that when you ask a sister if you look good her response goes something like," Well yeah, I guess, but that shirt you have on makes your face look weird." Or, my personal favorite, is mom's "Honey, that looks like a reject from the 70's."
Family is special. Yes, both *special* and special. No matter what kind of hat your dad wears or how many times your little sister licks the walls during the church service. They are with you for life. Although, yes, sometimes I admit....I have fear, when I shop at Walmart with my father, because I know that he is going to tell the kids to sit on the thing that spins around with bags. Or, when my mom decides that right in the middle of the parking lot she is going to start clapping, and won't go until you start clapping too. You have to understand...she looks crazy. She is a little crazy...but, the clapping thing is really a "Praisin' the Lord!" thing...you have to know my mom.
Then, I was talking to my sister the other day and we were talking about our house and the creek and she would tell me stories of big swings and crazy games that we played. ''Man'' I said, ''and I made it out alive?''
I like having people around that act just like me. Okay, okay...I like having people I can blame my craziness on.
Sometimes though, they are there to keep you humble. Sometimes they are there to make you look smarter. Sometimes they are there to embarrassed the life out of you in front of your friends and their parents. They are there to show you how big God is and make you glad that all you have is a little scar on your head instead of a half caved in one. They are there so that you always have a best friend. And sometimes they are there for good advice and good laughs.
Family is a good thing. They are the ones that can say "I love you, but I hate your shoes." They have that power to tell the truth to you and not be afraid that you will walk away. A kind of love that a family has for one another is different than most love. You never had to earn their love and you never have to worry about losing it. You don't have to be perfect or have walls firmly in place to protect yourself. Sometimes family isn't one ounce blood. There have been times that I wanted to never talk to parts of my family. Somehow, forgiveness always comes. They are the ones that can do something to us that makes us on fire with anger and yet 1o minutes later say something that makes us laugh like a crazy person.
My family is BIG and...slightly crazy. They all have different beliefs and styles. They each laugh differently and have their own ways of thinking and doing things. But not matter what they do or say, each one is the same in my eyes...priceless. Each one means so much to me, they are each very important to me; something that no amount of money and nothing on this earth could replace.
In Him I live a write,

Romantic winter moments...

The winter's weather is right outside your house. The frost is on the window. The tea pot is whistling and the fire is crackling. You are in your favorite flowing skirt and your hair is curled (just perfectly)....Nothing is better than this moment, right here. Ah, it would be a perfect time to pick up a good book and read it whilst rocking in my chair, sipping my hot tea.
Sadly, I don't own a rocking chair...I just thought I would play Anne of Green Gables for a minute. However, I did kinda have a point. It's just that, the way I wrote the perfect moment up above is NOT at all how my perfect moment starts off. Allow me to be honest and please allow me to ask that you love me even after you hear how it comes about.
I wake up because it is winter outside and it is freezing in my house and my body is just inches away from going in to hyperthermic shock. It demands that I seek heat elsewhere. The tea is not a romantic thing that will make my day go perfectly, but in fact, is needed to warm me and keep me healthy. The fire does get to crackling and, I must say, that it is very romantic when it does finally pump out the heat. The flowing skirt is very unlikely to happen...at least not for an hour...or more (maybe much more, if it really cold.) It's more like fuzzy socks and a nice warm pair of jeans and a comfy sweeter (or even my fuzzy PJs, if I am not immediately motivated.) This is more like how my perfect moment starts.. Oh wait, first I need my fuzzy blanket... Yes, much better, now I will read a book and sip my hot tea.
Winter is a wonderful time to catch up on all your reading. I love winter time in our house. We read a family book right after or before the bible, as a family, every night. We pick the books wisely so that all members of our family will enjoy them. It is a time when all I-pads , I-pods. Facebook, phones ,toys are put away and all the mysteries of the book are unsolved. I think that God has blessed many people to be wonderful writers and artist. And I erge you to see and read some of their wonderful stuff. I have put together some of the well loved books that are in our house hold.
Children books can be loved by all ages. Sometimes when one is being read aloud at home you will find the BIG kids listing too.

The I can read books are wonderful for kids who are just learning to read.

Biscuit Finds a Friend. By Alyssa Satin Capucilli (This book is very cute. I love it.)

Frog and Toad. By Arnold Lobel

Some other really cute books that children really like .

Becasue I love you. By Max Lucado

We're going on a bear hunt. By Michael Rosen Helen Oxenbury ( be prepare to have little children running around the house after you read this yelling "We're goin' on a bear hunt." it should only last a few days.")

Bear's new Friend. By Karma Wilson and Jane Chapman ( This one has beautiful pictures.)

The bear snores on . By Karma Wilson and Jane Chapman

God Gave us you. By Lisa Tawn Bergren

For little boys

God's Wisdom for little Boys. By Jim and Elizabeth George (This book is Character-Buiding Fun from the Proverbs

Will God's Mighty Warrior.By Sheila Walsh.

For little Girls

Fritz and the Beautiful Horses. By Jan Brett

Just like Mama. By Beverly Lewis

For the whole family

Old Yeller. By Fred Gipson

The Pilgrim's Progress.By John Bunyan

Where The Red Fern Grow. Wilson Rawls (Love this one..... Warning it comes with tears.)

Brother Andrew....... But sadly the book is not on hand so I can not share with you who wrote it. :(

Young ladies

For some families fake romanace is not allowed. I do own two very good and clean christian love books that are not misleading and are very helpful in a young ladies life. At least I think so....

Passion And Purity. By Elisabeth Elliot

Beloved Bride. By Bill Potter( Oh this one is amazing its The letters of Stonewall Jaackson to his wife. good good.)

These next ones are ones that I have read many times and still love picking them up and reading them.

A Lineage of Grace. By Francine Rivers

Redeeming Love.By Francine Rivers (Love it.)

Fathers and Daughters. By David Barrett And Elysse Barrett.

Before you meet prince charming. By Sarah Mally (This book was a gift to me from one of my married friends she loved it and said it was even helpful to her as a married women.)

His Chosen Bride. By Jennifer J.Lamp

Books for men or young men

Mere Christianity.By C.S lewis

This Present Darkness. Frank E. Pretti

How long O Lord? By D.A Carson

Kelpluck.By Patrick F. McManus (All his books are good... If you like funny he is the man!!)

Books for Mommies

Having a Mary Heart in a Martha world. By Joanna Weaver

Passionate Housewifes Desperate for God. By Jennie Chancey and Stacy Mcdonald

Heidi .By Johanna Spyri

Well, I hope you can take some of these books and find as much love for them as my family has. There are many many more wonderful books but for the sake of me not having to write a book myself on books I made you a start of a list...

In Him I live and write,

Brandie Faith

Guess what....it's not about you!!!!

Guess what.....it's not about you! Or me.... OH dear, don't these words make us just get fired up. But just because you own a shirt that says it is all about you, doesn't mean it is... See all the lies this world has told you!!?? It's okay, you can cry. Okay...you can stop now. Go on and just wipe your tears away so that you can read my point now... Please.
Praising and worshiping GOD. I find it so silly that the body of Christ makes such a big deal about what songs are holy and which songs are not. It has become such an issue that they are even willing to separate because of how a pastor leads his music. I heard one man say how "anything that is in all these new churches these days is part of the worship of Satan." But let us not be judgmental... It is just as bad on the other side. " I can't worship when all we do is sing hymns and listen to the piano..." It is sad. I was reading the psalms and there is A LOT of stuff in there about worship. Hmmm...funny how that is. Sometimes when I hear these comments I want to ask these Christians if they have ever read the book of Psalms.
Psalm 147:1 ~"PRAISE the LORD! For it is good to sing praises to our GOD;
For it is pleasant ,and praise is beautiful. "
Did you see how that verse said Praise the Lord, and not praise man or self? Did you see how that verse said that praise is beautiful, but it didn't tell you what kind of praise was beautiful? Could it be because that praise and worship mean something that our minds think they don't? For some reason we think that praise means a song or just a tone of a song; or the way we sing it not understanding the fullness of that word.
Worship: The activity of glorifying God in His presence with our voices and hearts. ~ Wayne Grudem.
Our English word of worship means "worthship," denoting the worthiness of an individual to receive special honor in accordance with that worth.
So, how dare we make it about us? How dare we say that we are unable to worship GOD because a song was (or was not) written 100 years ago? That's NOT worship that's idolatry. That is us taking what is meant for God and creating something that is joyful...for us; something that we seem to feel should make us happy. Soooo that we can honor God, except not really. It is for us. We wanna feel all warm and fuzzy inside...'cause that means we really love God, right? It doesn't matter how Christians sing "Amazing Grace" or what the songs lyrics are. What matters is what our hearts look like. Are we doing it for His Glory; to honor and praise Him? Or, are we seeking fuzzy bunnies that make us feel good?
Matthew 15:8 ~ "These people draw near to Me with their mouth. And honor Me with their lips, But their hearts are far from Me, And in vain they worship Me."
Worship should be us honoring God and REALIZING His worth and His GREATNESS. It is not us getting excited because our favorite song is next! And folks, let us be honest, it should NOT end with the song. We should be able to look at God and in our hearts praise Him because He is good....ALL the time...continuously. We should desire to sing to Him because of the mercies He shows us for even allowing us to even stand before Him. We can do it out loud or in the quietness of our heart, in honor of Him, joyfully.

Here are some verses that I would like to share...
Psalm 149:3-4 ~ " Let them praise His name with the dance; Let them sing praises to Him with the timbrel and harp. For the LORD takes pleasure in His people; He will beautify the humble with salvation.
Psalm 150~ "Praise ye the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power.
Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.
Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp.
Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs.
Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals.
Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD. "
Psalm 98~ " A Psalm. O sing unto the LORD a new song; for he hath done marvellous things: his right hand, and his holy arm, hath gotten him the victory.
The LORD hath made known his salvation: his righteousness hath he openly shewed in the sight of the heathen.
He hath remembered his mercy and his truth toward the house of Israel: all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God.
Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all the earth: make a loud noise, and rejoice, and sing praise.
Sing unto the LORD with the harp; with the harp, and the voice of a psalm.
With trumpets and sound of cornet make a joyful noise before the LORD, the King.
Let the sea roar, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.
Let the floods clap their hands: let the hills be joyful together
Before the LORD; for he cometh to judge the earth: with righteousness shall he judge the world, and the people with equity.
Psam 134:2~ Lift up your hands in the sanctuary, and bless the LORD.

“Though we cannot think alike, may we not love alike? May we not be of one heart, though we are not of one opinion? Without all doubt, we may. Herein all the children of God may unite, notwithstanding these smaller differences.” —from a sermon in the Works of John Wesley
"Above all sing spiritually. Have an eye to God in every word you sing. Aim at pleasing him more than yourself, or any other creature. In order to do this attend strictly to the sense of what you sing, and see that your heart is not carried away with the sound, but offered to God continually; so shall your singing be such as the Lord will approve here, and reward you when he cometh in the clouds of heaven."~ John Wesley

I want to share with you something that helped me understand what worship looks like. Yesterday at church we were singing "Shout to the Lord." And this small 7 year old was singing it off key, loud, and, I believe, truly with all his heart. "SHOUT TO THE LORD ALL THE EARTH LET US SING!" Oh, that we could be like that. Just making a joyous noise unto the Lord with all our hear, belting it out at the tip-top of our lungs because He is so amazing and so good! Doing it all for Him and not one bit of you or me! So, I challenge you, the next time you worship to do it in a way that honors God. Make it about Him not about you. Don't complain about people with hands raised or standing up to long... Honor God because He is worthy. He loves us and loves when we worship Him.
In Him I live and write,
Brandie Faith