“All little girls should be told they are pretty, even if they aren't.”
Marilyn Monroe

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Speak of me!

I want you all to understand my heart right now. All my emotions are freaking out.I'm fighting back tears wondering why I don't just let them all out. All because of the LOVE my GOD has for ME.
I really feel like someone just expressed their deep love for me. But even better because GOD has, and his love will never end it is perfect and all you need. Thank you God.

I guess I should start from the beginning. I have known Christ for 4 years now. It has been a long, but wonderful 4 years I can't wait to see what he has in store for the rest of my life.
He has always spoke to me when I was in need of change(happened a lot) Sometimes he brings many things together so that I can learn one thing. Well it happened again.
I was talking with my mother about my gifts and the things that I'm not so good at. Well it was very clear that I had a fear to speak about Christ to unbelievers unless they themselves brought it up. I don't know why it's that way it just is. I don't really have a problem living my life in a different way than the world does. I do hurt every time I see someone I love and I know they're destined to Hell. I really do love God and know that I OWE him my everything. That is why three days ago I started praying that God would change my heart that he would take all the fear away, and allow me to speak boldly of his name like I should. I prayed I would get over myself, and just do it.
Lesson 0ne: Bible reading!
I was doing my nightly devotions and it just so happened that I was reading these verses. Well, it didn't " just so happen," God made it that way.
Matthew 10:27-33
"Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light ; and what you hear in the ear . preach on the house tops." "and do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father's will "But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. " Do not fear therefore ; you are of more value than many sparrows."
This is a BIG one!
"Therefore whoever confesses Me before men, him I will also confess before My Father who is in heaven. "But whoever denies Me before men, him I will also deny before My Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 10:38-42
" He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for my sake will find it. "He who receives you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me." He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward. And he who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man's reward.
" And whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of cold water in the name of a disciple,assuredly, I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward."
These are verse I have read many times before. But this time I got it............... The Lord DIDN'T stop there. No, he thought I needed some more.
Lesson two:
So today while I was babysitting, I was deciding if I should do some History or something else. I was convicted to do some History. Well once again it ("just so happened") that the chapter I was reading was about a young man who was ALSO convected to speak out loud for Christ. I will share a bit more about his man.
His name is Yohannan He lived, at the time in a remote village in Asia. He was a small man, 90 pounds. But when God layed it on his heart to speak about Him he was 16 years old. He had just recently signed up for a traveling mission group, but was turned down because of his age. His heart was confused God had layed something on his heart and now it wasn't going to happen he could not understand. But God knew he knew from the beginning what Yohannan was called to do .
I'm going to share part of the book with you.(Revolution in world Missions-K.P. Yohannan)
"Alone that night in my bed, I argued with both God and my own conscience. By two o'clock in the morning my pillow wet with sweat and tears, I shook with fear. What if God asked me to preach in the street? How would I ever be able to stand up in public and speak? What if I were stoned and beaten? I knew myself only to well. I could hardly bear to look a friend in the eyes during a conversation, let alone speak publicly to hostile crowds on behalf of God. As I spoke the words, I realized that I was behaving as Moses did when he was called. Suddenly, I felt that I was not alone in the room. A great sense of love and of my being loved filled the place. I felt the presence of God and fell on my knees beside the bed." Lord God," I gasped in surrender to His presence and will, "I'll give myself to speak for you -but help me to know that You're with me."
The very next morning when he walk out on the streets like he had some many times before done his heart cried for all the people walking by for he knew they would all most likely go to Hell. He prayed God help me know what to do. When he looked up he seen a huge rock he knew he was to go preach Christ's name. He did that day and from then on.
I love it. I read this and at the end thanked God that he would care enough for me to teach me. I'm so unworthy of his love, but still he answers me when I pray and is with me every step of the way when I need to grow or do something.
I find it so cool that things kept coming to me. I know that I'm not meant to be a preacher. I do not even think God has called me to be a foreign missionary. But I do think that I am a 17 year old lady who was called by God to speak about him in my every day life. Every chance I get. To be fearless, and to bring glory to his name in a whole new way.
Always Brandie Faith

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